Sunday, May 22, 2011

Tomorrow

I return to work.  I'm not quite sure how I feel about this. 

On one hand, I love my job...I love the kids, I love my coworkers and I love the feeling to accomplishment that I have at the end of the day. 

But those are all things that I felt before I knew Natalie.  Maybe now my love for her will trump any love I have for my career and I will be miserable for the eight hours a day that I'm at school.

Or maybe...and this is the even scarier thought...I will enjoy my eight hours away from her during the day.  Will that make me a terrible mother?

I'm not sure which is worse - being miserable because I'm away from her, or guilty because I'm NOT miserable that I'm away from her. 

And so the working mother conundrum begins.

1 comment:

Melissa said...

I know exactly how you feel. It sucks because I miss her and then it's great because I get to still do what I love. At least you are close to summer and will get to enjoy a lot more time with her at home. I always tell myself when I'm feeling bad about leaving Briley is that I couldn't ask for a better job with all the time off, etc.!! I hope today went well!!