Monday, July 7, 2008

Hate

I hate that in one weekend, you ruined two years of trust.
I hate that I can't believe you when you tell me where you are.
I hate that I question your feelings for me.
I hate when you mention her name.
I hate that you thrust me back into that dark place I thought I had left.
I hate how you made our relationship feel less than adequate.
I hate that I can't ever live up to the relationship you had with her.
I hate that you placed her needs above our relationship.
I hate that I can't look at you the same way.
I hate your dad for what he did to you.
I hate that you underestimated how badly your actions would hurt me.
I hate that you think that just because we talked about the situation, it's resolved.
I hate her for still relying on you.
I hate you for not seeing her unhealthy reliance on you.
I hate that I can't get over the anger.
I hate that I can't forgive you and move on.
I hate that I still want to punish you for what you did.

And I hate that I still love you.