Wednesday, April 22, 2009

The Results...

Craig is at basketball tonight and quite frankly...I'm glad I have the house to myself tonight. Today started out a little rough because I'm not a patient person. I wanted my MRI results and I wanted them this morning. So when I threw a frustrated mini-fit in the coaches office after being sent to voicemail (for the second time today) I was even more enraged when I was told that I needed to "not over-react and to be more patient"...or something else insulting to that effect. I was not in the mood to hear those words. I wanted to hear: "I'm sorry you're having to wait for the results. I know that you're anxious about what the MRI showed. I'm sure they'll call you back as soon as they're free." But no. I didn't. Don't worry...I might not have been comforted but the tournament sure as heck got finished.

Sigh. I know that patience and compassion are virtues. I get that...but when both of us need those things from each other over a course of a month - it gets a bit exhausting! He's got to schedule and organize a 58 team tournament for this weekend which I know is time-consuming. And it doesn't help that as soon as he thinks he's finalized the tourney someone either cancels a team or another team wants to play, and can you turn down a team that's willing to give you almost 300 bucks?! So he was having to return to the drawing board repeatedly as well as deal with disgruntled business partners and clients. And to top it all off? Because of our district track meet last night, he didn't even START on schedules until 10:30 pm. Plus...his knee is still hurting him and his doctor appointment is tomorrow morning at 9:30. I am praying that the doctor can find a way to just fix it once and for all.

The good news is that while I was typing that last paragraph, I did begin to have a little bit more sympathy for him.

And I'm frustrated. My knee is still hurting and it's a weird hurt - if I sit around and do virtually nothing (like I did this weekend) my knee feels fine. Unfortunately, I don't have the luxury of staying in my pjs everyday watching Oprah. I do have to be up and on my feet for the better part of a day. It's the up and moving around part of my life that is bothering my knee. I did finally talk to my doctor around 5:45 this afternoon and he said that he was surprised by my MRI because it only showed a "small tear" in the meniscus. He said that surgery was not the first option and that I should come in for a Cortisone shot sometime in the near future. If that doesn't clear it up, then we'll look at going in and cleaning up my knee arthroscopically. Call me a skeptic, but I'm a little...well...skeptic. Although I know that my knee is nowhere near the carnage that Craig has but the Cortisone shot did absolutely nothing for him. It seems to me to be a little bit of a band-aid method of medicine. I'm no doctor, but I am under the impression that a meniscus cartilage tear doesn't just heal up all on it's own. And another point...does the doctor expect me to sit around and not do anything physical? I am jumping out of my skin to get back on the volleyball court. Give me a white ball and a wall and I will work out any and all aggression I have in life. I haven't had that outlet in three weeks. I have a feeling that in order for Craig and I to continue in the relatively blissful harmony that we have...I'm going to need to get on a volleyball court STAT. And if I can't? Give me some anesthesia and clean me out. I don't want to hurt anymore and I need to get back into the game.

On that note...I was also disappointed about the diagnosis from the standpoint of "My knee hurts bad. I can barely walk at night because it's so stiff and swollen. I am having sharp and dull pain on either side of my knee." This has been going on for three weeks. I kind of feel like a big, fat crybaby right now. Growing up there were lots of times that I wouldn't feel good but I still had to go to school. I tore ligaments in my ankles twice and never saw a doctor about either of them. My parents generally had a "suck it up" attitude and when I did finally get sick...I always felt guilty because I knew that they were taking off work to be at home with me. More so from my mom because she was a little bit more verbal about being busy at work. She might deny it but I have a memory like an elephant and I did sometimes feel guilty because I knew that there were more "important" things that had to be taken care of at work instead of taking care of me. It also made me feel like I was faking. Case in point: last summer's debacle with the appendix. Everyone thought I was hungover and no one actually believed that I was sick! I felt guilty having my mom come over and take me to the dad didn't think we should go to the ER. It was sweet, sweet redemtion when the doctor's announced that my appendix had to come out the next morning. So maybe I feel like I'm back in that I'm faking or something and the "faking" is backed up by photographic evidence that there really isn't something wrong with my knee. So I guess I just feel like I have to "suck it up" and get on with life.

And one more thing because I'm bored...

What Was I Doing Ten Years Ago:
- I was playing lots of basketball.
- Dating and breaking up with Nick W.
- Finishing up my less than illustrious career as a JV high jumper.
- Hanging out with Ali, Leigh Ann and the basketball boys.
- Fighting with my mother.

5 Things On My To-Do List Today:
1. Lesson plans (completed!)
2. Get doctor's results (small meniscus tear in right knee)
3. Take a nap (delightful)
4. Discuss morning's conversation with Craig (not yet - gotta quit being actively angry)
5. Catch up on DVR (done!)

5 Places I Have Traveled:
1. London, England
2. Las Vegas, Nevada
3. Munich and Berlin, Germany
4. Amsterdam, The Netherlands
5. Rome, Venice, Sorrento, Florence, Naples and Capri, Italy

5 Snacks Or Treats I Enjoy:
1. Venti Skinny Vanilla Latte from Starbucks
2. Strawberry Limeade from Sonic
3. Popcorn
4. Chex Mix type snacks
5. Green apples

5 Places I've Lived:
1. Hurst for about 18 years
2. Dorm room at UNT in Denton
3. Apartment #1 with Elaine and apartment #2 with Lauren in Denton
4. An apartment in Euless all on my own for 2.5 years
5. A beautiful new house with Craig in Flo Mo!

5 Jobs I've Had:
1. YMCA After School Counselor (Senior year)
2. Lifeguard at NRH2O (Summers after junior, senior and freshman years)
3. Children's Courtyard After School Counselor (3 summers during and 1 summer after college)
4. TAKS and 7th grade Math teacher (one semester)
5. Volleyball coach and 6th grade Geography teacher (wrapping up 3rd year)

1 comment:

The Voskuil's said...

That was me! Man I miss 10 years ago...only if it had lasted a little longer. Wait...we might have got into too much trouble!